“Happy Birthday To Me” This week, Ghostface puts down his knife and picks up a far more destructive and devious weapon; tequila, that great shatterer of dreams and ruiner of friendships. It was one thing when he was just bothering people with menacing phone calls and the occasional stabbing. Now … Read More
“The Shallows” (2016) Directed by Jaume Collet-Serra. Starring Blake Lively, Óscar Jaenada and Brett Cullen. Smart movie about woman vs. shark. Similar in intensity to “Jaws,” with deeper character development. It’s your basic girl meets shark, shark likes girl, but girl isn’t really into shark, story. We have a plucky heroine evading … Read More
“The Conjuring 2” (2016) Directed by James Wan. Starring Vera Farmiga, Patrick Wilson and Madison Wolfe. Demonologist Ed Warren and his clairvoyant medium wife Lorraine travel to England to confront evil in multiple forms as they come to the aid of a beleaguered single mother and her four children tormented by a … Read More
Scream Episode 3 “Vacancy” We pick up with Audrey kneeling on the floor of the Crescent Palms storage unit, picking the incriminating message pinned to dead Jake’s chest off. Probably for the best, since the police might wonder what “See how I finished the job for you, Audrey?” … Read More
Scream Season 2 Episode 2 “Psycho” Emma flees the old Troy James house in terror as a hooded figure lurks within. She breathlessly tells Brooke about the collage of her childhood pics on the wall, and they take off in Brooke’s car. Back at the Duval residence, Maggie … Read More
First, a word of warning. No part of the following review mentions any sounds Jake makes. Hey, don’t be mad. You clicked on the clickbait. It’s been 9 months since we last saw the Lakewood crew. Let’s recap. In 1994, a deformed small town teenager named Brandon James fell … Read More
“Sharkansas Women’s Prison Massacre” (2016) Directed by Jim Wynorski. Starring Traci Lords, Dominique Swain and Christine Nguyen. This made for TV B-movie extravaganza features buxom women being attacked by sharks. But, not the way you’d think. No, these are subterranean, prehistoric sharks that are sent to the surface after a fracking … Read More
“Holidays” (2016) is a horror anthology flick that explores the darker side of holiday traditions. Or at least, that might have been the general idea. Many of the stories blaze their own trails and wind up in unrecognizable terrain as far as what images spring to mind when we … Read More
“Hush” (2016) Directed by Mike Flanagan. Starring John Gallagher Jr., Kate Siegel and Michael Trucco. A deaf novelist living in isolation deep in the woods is terrorized by a masked stalker. Will she fall prey to his dark plans, or has he chosen the wrong victim? Maddie lives in a world … Read More
“Knock Knock” (2015) Directed by Eli Roth. Starring Keanu Reeves, Lorenza Izzo and Ana De Armas. Poor 40-year-old, neglected by his wife and sex- starved Evan is ambushed by two randy gals that blackmail him. He gets back at them by comparing them to free pizza. Which is kind of unfair to free pizza. … Read More
