We open with a warning: CAUTION: Red Rapture is an addictive substance and might cause permanent physical & psychological damage. Midnight Grindhouse, Universal Cable Productions, and SyFy do not condone its use. You’ll remember Red Rapture as the drug introduced in the pilot, used by scavengers in … Read More
Wish Upon (2017) Directed by John R. Leonetti. Starring Joey King, Ryan Phillippe and Ki Hong Lee. A teenage girl discovers an antique Chinese music box that grants 7 wishes, each of which comes with a deadly price in this simplistic retelling of W.W. Jacob’s short story “The Monkey’s Paw.” In … Read More
It’s Day 3 of the race and we find ourselves in Utah, 30 miles from the nightmare of cannibalism and murder at the Pixie Swallow Diner. We open with Cliff and Domi listening to soft rock and speeding towards the next finish line. She complains that he’s driving their … Read More
Race Day Two-Arizona At the Pixie Swallow Motel & Diner, the blonde waitress is sassy and beautiful, the customers are hungry and the short order cook is chopping up people meat in the kitchen. On the road, Arthur and Grace bicker about the race, his morals and … Read More
In an alternate universe 1999, a police officer stumbles across a subculture of psychopaths involved in an ultraviolent cross country race in cars that run on human blood. Naturally, he joins up. I’m going to break down and discuss this first episode in great detail, so just be warned that … Read More
Hot Blood Sundae (2008) Directed by John Darbonne. Starring Bobbi Billard, Gelusa Zaripova and Shastina Eloff. A masked killer with an interest in turning women into new soft serve flavors targets the bikini clad employees of an Adults Only ice cream store. We open with blonde bimbo Girlfriend having a … Read More
Beasterday (2014) Directed by John Bacchus. Starring Jon Arthur, Kristina Beaudouin, Valerie Bittner. A giant carnivorous Easter bunny is chased around by a small town dog catcher and a failed actress as it dines on human prey. “Beasterday” opens with a lazy credits sequence involving Easter eggs, and then we’re off … Read More
Cannibal Diner (2012) Directed by Frank W. Montag. Starring Alexandra Lesch, Kristiana Rohder, Lara Baum. A young woman enters an abandoned factory to rescue her model friends from a clan of mutant cannibals after a camping trip gone wrong. I went into “Cannibal Diner” with certain expectations after reading the … Read More
Alien Covenant (2017) Directed by Ridley Scott. Starring Michael Fassbender, Katherine Waterston and Billy Crudup. 10 years after the crew of the Prometheus met their end, the colony ship Covenant follows a mysterious signal to a habitable planet hiding deadly secrets. We open in the past as the android David … Read More
The Black Room (2016) Directed by Rolfe Kanefsky. Starring Natasha Henstridge, Lukas Hassel and Lin Shaye. An ancient Incubus imprisoned in the basement of a suburban house makes erotic trouble for new home owners Paul and Jennifer Hemdale. In the opening scene, Maggie Black (horror legend Lin Shaye) wakes up in the … Read More
